A Bentley and a Spanking for Christmas by Nigel Byng

A Bentley and a Spanking for Christmas by Nigel Byng

Mr. Sookram was the first and only man I had ever seen driving an oxcart. He used to bring my friend Singles and his little sister Savita to school every morning on this behemoth. Then he would head off to the cane field to start his job as a cart driver.

The friendly but playful beast, all two tons of him, was named Bentley, like the luxury vehicle. Singles used to tell everybody his father drove a Bentley, and because we had never ever seen a Bentley, we incorrectly assumed that Bentley was a breed of Oxen.

But that is how it was growing up in a third-world country in the 1970’s. We had no television unless you took into consideration the small black-and-white thing with a screen about the size of a toaster. Watching Sesame Street in black and white, left plenty to the imagination. I remember being shocked when I learned that Big Bird was actually as yellow as a canary. But I digress.

Anyway, one particular Christmas morning, Singles had ended up at my place much earlier than usual, because Bentley had gone roaming overnight. This was a bit of a problem, as Mr. Sookram and Bentley were to be Santa and his one reindeer…or Ox, for the Christmas parade.

How anyone could manage to lose a pet the size of a car, is something that only Singles could explain. But when all was said and done, Bentley was found casually grazing in the field behind my house.

He wasn’t in the mood to be taken home, so we decided that he could just spend the morning at my place. It’s not like we had a choice anyway. Bentley had a mind of his own, and if you’ve ever tried reasoning with an Ox, you would understand our dilemma.

As we sat waiting for Bentley to finish his green breakfast, Singles spotted my neighbor’s laden grapefruit tree. It didn’t take much for me to convince him to clamber over the fence and bring back enough to feed a small army.

We ran that morning to the cane fields with our stolen loot and sucked on grapefruits until the sun was high up in the sky. Lost and forgotten in our gluttony, was the Christmas Day street parade. It wasn’t until we heard the scream of his mother’s voice breaking the sound barrier, that we remembered. Back then, corporal punishment was a standard reward for any sort of ill-advised behavior, and we both understood that our spanking was as guaranteed as the sunrise. So, we ran.

We would’ve made a great escape to nowhere, except that Bentley thought it was a fun game, and chased after us. Oxen don’t normally run anywhere. But Bentley was more of a house pet than a beast of burden. And he certainly didn’t behave like any other Ox on the planet.

If you have ever had the unfortunate experience of being chased by an Ox, or any kind of cattle, you will know why some grownups are so blasphemous. The Lord’s name was the only thing I heard when Bentley charged through the cane field that morning. Well, that and every other curse word that only drunks and mad people were allowed to utter.

I got a Christmas day spanking, or cutarse, as the difference between the two is very clearly defined, with the latter bordering on attempted murder. I also got grounded for the Christmas Day street parade, which I thought was rather unfair. And had to watch Bentley the big old Ox, dressed up like Rudolph the bloody red-nosed reindeer from my bedroom window, as every other kid got their presents from the back of an ox cart.

Isn’t life a bugger.

Author’s Bio

Nigel Byng is a freelance writer, living in the USA. He recently contributed to Happiness in Unexpected Places; an anthology of stories compiled by authors and media professionals from across the globe. His writing can be found on Signs of the Times Australia; MasticadoresIndia, or on his personal blog www.hytsdaily.com where he displays his love of fiction and poetry under his pen name, Jerome Kenrick.