Where’s the UPS guy by Nolcha Fox & Barbara Leonhard

with my Amazon Prime delivery
I wanted two yesterdays ago?
Why don’t you reroute your route
to bring it early for once?
Don’t you know this is my fix?
I can’t go to bed without it.

And why do you 
deliver packages 
on my back fence? 
I find them clinging to the rim
in the rain no less. 
I never did receive 
“How to Dress a Fish” - 
though it was “delivered”.
You claim you never 
make mistakes.
But now I miss 
my poetry fix.

I know you’re in a hurry
to get to your next stop,
or you might need
to take a bathroom break.
But please protect 
my packages from
rain and snow
and theft, and
I’ll keep you
from being fired
by giving you
good ratings.

Was this from you? 
“Dear customer, 
there’s been a plague.
The supply chain has COVID.
Ships, planes, and trucks
are on life support.
Deliveries are limited.
Tissues, cough drops,
and poetry books
are on back order.”

“Dear UPS Guy,
I understand you can’t control
this COVID state of life.
Please find enclosed
some masks and gloves
and anti-everything spray.
Now get to work. Get me my stuff,
don’t you want to get paid?”

“Thank you for contacting us.
My name is B. Bot.
This call is being monitored
for the heck of it. 
Mmmm. I see. I see. No way! 
Let me transfer you
to the UPS guy.
We hope your issue 
has been resolved.”
Click

Bio.

Barbara Leonhard is an internationally known prize-winning poet and Pushcart nominee. She is especially indebted to Well Versed 2021: A Collection of Poetry and Prose and Spillwords Press for past honors. Her debut poetry collection, Three-Penny Memories: A Poetic Memoir (Experiments in Fiction, 2022), which is about her relationship with her mother, who suffered from Alzheimer’s, is a best seller on Amazon. Barbara is also Editor for MasticadoresUSA. You can follow her on WordPress at extraordinarysunshineweaver.blog.

Nolcha Fox’s poems have been published in Lothlorien Poetry Journal, Alien Buddha Zine, Medusa’s Kitchen, and others. Her poetry books are available on Amazon and Dancing Girl Press. Nominee for 2023 Best of The Net. Editor for Open Arts Forum. Accidental interviewer/reviewer. Faker of fake news. Website: https://bit.ly/3bT9tYu Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/nolcha.fox/ Instagram: nfoxauthor